The 6 Best BDSM Films of the 21st Century
A few days ago I finally got around to watching the film “Crash” which I’ve seen mentioned in a lot of lists of “the best” or “must see” kink and BDSM films. I don’t know how it took me almost 30 years to find the time to watch it, especially as it stars James Spader who is an actor I really respect, but I have to say that I found that the film just felt very… dated.
I guess it’s no surprise as the film was released way back in 1996, but it got me thinking that a lot of these lists of kink and BDSM films are really dusting off some rather “classic” cinema with films like “Belle De Jour” from 1967 or “The Night Porter” from 1974. Don’t get me wrong, I think that some of the classics like “Salo, or the 120 Days of Sodom” and “The Story of O”, both from 1975, still have a lot to offer viewers even today, but I’ve been doing BDSM for a very long time and those films are even older than I am. Perhaps it’s time for a list of essential kink and BDSM films from this millennium?
Of course less than a decade ago in 2015 the controversial film “Fifty Shades of Grey” brought about a tectonic shift in the BDSM world. But I’ve watched that film and without going into the merits of the film or the terrible abusive relationship the story depicts, I’ve got to say that it just wouldn’t make it onto any list I was making of BDSM films. In my opinion it’s just not a BDSM film at all.
So, which films would make my list of “Must see BDSM films of the 21st Century”? I’m glad that you asked, because here they are, my personal recommendations:
Quills (2000)
I know, the 21st Century actually started in 2001, but despite being made in 2000, Quills was not released in some countries (including Australia where I lived at the time) until early 2001. So I’ll let this one slide in because I think it’s a very important film. Quills tells the story of the Marquis de Sade (the guy from the 1700s who sadism is literally named after). The film is filled with historical inaccuracies, but it’s a fun film and a great place to start learning more about de Sade and the history of sexual sadism.
Secretary (2002)
The original Mr Grey, the film you will most often hear people telling you is much better than 50 Shades. James Spader (the man is definitely kinky) plays a Dominant who is uncomfortable with his kinky predilections, which for many people is a very true and relatable story. While secretary is very much grounded in the realistic struggles of both the Dominant and submissive, it does not show a good healthy BDSM dynamic. The characters struggle with their desires and there’s far too much topping from the bottom for my tastes. At over 20 years old, Secretary is still likely to come across feeling very dated for some of the new generation of kinksters, but I think it’s still a very relatable story for many people on both sides of a BDSM dynamic, and it’s one of the best BDSM films ever made.
Sleeping Beauty (2011)
This is not the Disney fairy tale you’re thinking of. This Australian erotic drama is far from uplifting and there’s no happily ever after. It’s a little dark, depressing and self destructive at times, but I’ve watched it a few times with different people and they’ve all enjoyed it.
The Duke of Burgundy (2014)
A slow burn story of topping from the bottom. The film is visually impressive and explores a struggle that is very real and relatable for many submissives and their partners who are just not as Dominant as they would like. I’ve only watched this film once and I can’t say that I’m in a rush to see it again, but I still think that it’s a good film that a lot of kinky people will enjoy and is worth watching.
Professor Marston and the Wonder Women (2017)
When you think about it, it should be pretty obvious that whoever wrote the Wonder Woman comics was into BDSM. This film is based on the true story of the original creator of Wonder Woman, his wife, and their polyamorous life partner. A window into the lives and struggles of early kink, BDSM, and poly people in a time when such things were far less tolerated than they are today. I highly recommend watching this film, in fact just writing about it in this post makes me want to watch it again now.
Dogs Don’t Wear Pants (2019)
Possibly the best BDSM film of all time. Disclaimer: I’m in the film (just for a moment in the background) and I consulted on some of the BDSM scenes, so I may be a little biased on this one. This Finnish language erotic black comedy tells the story of a man who falls into BDSM for the wrong reasons, loses himself in sub-frenzy and eventually finds his way to some extent. Even if I hadn’t been involved in the making of this film, I would still highly recommend it and I do genuinely think that it’s a great film and well worth watching.
What do you think of this list? Did I miss any recent films that you really enjoyed? Did you discover a new film here? I'd love to hear your feedback.
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